Why You Are Awesome

"When you try your best, but you don't succeed. When you get what you want, but not what you need. When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep. Stuck in reverse."

"If you never try you'll never know, just what you're worth."

When I was listening to this song ("Fix You" by my favorite band Coldplay) a thought kept running through my head. Often times, I feel like I don't have control over anything: like I am just a part of the dreaded "system." I go through every day like a zombie, doing things because it's just how life is here in the USA. Class. Work. Homework. Sleep. Then wake up and do it all over again. And then I realize that the more I do this, the less and less I feel like I am actually living. And I go to bed wondering, what did I miss today that I should've taken advantage of?

It's actually quite sad to live life this way: like you're "stuck in reverse"...going through the motions...feeling tired, but not because you have done so much to actually make your body tired. You're tired because you haven't done enough.

Potential. There is always so much potential that I feel like I can't reach. I've mentioned this multiple times before: this thought that I am meant for so, so much more than what I am currently doing. I feel like I have mounds of untapped potential, like I can do almost anything, but for some reason, I'm doing very little.

Is it wrong to think this way? Am I just expecting more out of life than I should be? Maybe it is a result of my difficulty with being realistic about my current condition. I don't have a ton of money right now, so of course I'm not going to be traveling the world and going on a bunch of big huge adventures. And it's impossible to meet everyone in the world and make them all my friends. Still...still, there has to be more than what I am experiencing day after day. I've got so many ideas, so many thoughts that flicker in and out of my head day by day that go unrecognized by the public. Then again, this doesn't make me an individual: everyone has brilliant ideas! I think I just tend to notice mine more than the average person.

So, where does this leave me? Feeling boring, unfulfilled, and sad about everything? Nope. Not at all.

I don't believe in going through life thinking that we can't change anything, and that "things are the way they are." Of course things can change! And it doesn't take an army to change them. Think about it, how did things get to the way they are now? Because of innovative, individual thinkers who felt exactly the way I do now, but decided to act on it.

The first step is to understand what Coldplay was saying with the line: "If you never try, you'll never know what you're worth." If you never try, you won't ever know. You have to get up off of your butt and stop complaining, and go out there and show everyone what an awesome person you are. Show people why they should like you, and why you matter. Be the change that you wish to see in the world.

The second step is to understand personally why you are awesome. Let's face it, it will be difficult for you to make any friends or any changes if you don't understand yourself first. To be honest, I find this a difficult step. But I've managed to find things about myself that I love, and so can you! Think: what makes you love yourself? What makes you get up day after day? What makes you smile about the way you are?

Third and final step: GO! Go out and implement the changes that you wish to see. Show people your ideas. Prove to people why you deserve to be recognized. And remember, not everyone is going to listen, or care. Most people don't give a damn. But in the rare cases where we make our best friends, it's because they did care, and they saw what you saw. "If you never try you'll never know, just what you're worth."

"Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you." <3 Better yet, try to fix yourself.

Happy Wanderings